White House chaos: Bidens’ dog Major on a biting spree, Secret Service agents beware!
So, it turns out that President Joe Biden’s dog Major is not exactly a model citizen when it comes to playing nice with the Secret Service. In fact, according to newly released Secret Service emails, Major has been sinking his teeth into agents like they’re juicy steak bones, with a grand total of 24 bites to his name.
Now, I’m no dog whisperer, but that seems like a lot of bites for one furry friend to dish out. I mean, what did these Secret Service agents do to deserve such a rough greeting from Major? Forget about guarding the leader of the free world, these poor agents were just trying to avoid becoming a chew toy for the presidential pooch.
The White House tours were briefly put on hold due to blood on the floor from one of Major’s biting incidents. I can just picture the scene now â?? tourists walking through the halls of power, only to stumble upon a crime scene straight out of a canine horror movie. Forget about the Lincoln Bedroom, Major’s teeth marks are the real attraction now.
But fear not, Major fans, because the Bidens have sent their troublemaker dog back to Delaware for some much-needed obedience training. Because nothing says “I’m sorry for biting you 24 times” like a little time out at doggy boot camp. Maybe Major will come back to the White House with a shiny new certificate in “How to Not Maul Secret Service Agents.”
In all seriousness, though, owning a pet is a huge responsibility, especially when that pet happens to be living in the White House. It’s important to recognize the signs of aggression early on and take the necessary steps to prevent any biting incidents. After all, we can’t have Major going all Cujo on the White House staff â?? that’s a PR nightmare waiting to happen.
So here’s to Major, the biting bandit of the White House, and to the Bidens for taking the necessary steps to address his behavior. Let’s hope that Major comes back from training a reformed dog, ready to charm the Secret Service with his wagging tail instead of his sharp teeth. And if all else fails, maybe they can just give him a bone to chew on instead.
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Source: The Washington Post
URL: https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2024/02/22/biden-dog-commander-bite-24-agents/