“Former FBI informant who lied about Bidens pleads not guilty, ordered to stay in jail” So, here we have Alexander Smirnov, the former FBI informant who allegedly lied about the Bidens, pleading not guilty and getting slapped with a one-way ticket to the slammer in sunny California. I guess the California sun won’t be shining…
“Emperor Trump demands immunity from puny Earth laws, throws social media fit.” Greetings, fellow beings of the universe! It is I, your intrepid Alien journalist from the Planet Duh, here to report on the latest antics of Earth’s most infamous orange-hued inhabitant, Donald Trump. Strap in, dear readers, as we delve into the absurdity that…
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Travis Kelce skips Taylor Swift, parties in Vegas – will Queen be next? Ah, the life of a professional athlete. After a whirlwind trip to Australia, Kansas City Chiefs star tight end Travis Kelce wasted no time hitting up the party scene in Las Vegas. And let me tell you, this guy knows how to…
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RNC Member Henry Barbour Bars Party from Paying Trump’s Legal Bills: Neutrality or Backlash? So, here we are again, folks. Another day, another scandal in the world of politics. This time, it’s a Republican National Committee member, Henry Barbour from Mississippi, who’s trying to put a stop to the party using its precious funds to…
“Popcorn Brain Epidemic: Social Media Overload Leads to Decreased Productivity and Cognitive Function” So, you think you have what is known as popcorn brain, huh? Congratulations, you are officially a victim of the digital age. Coined by researcher David Levy back in 2011, popcorn brain is the latest trendy term used to describe the utter…
“Unveiling the Secrets of Neptune and Uranus: New Moons Discovered in Solar System” So, the latest gossip in the solar system is that Neptune and Uranus have some new friends joining the party. That’s right, folks, Neptune now has a whopping 16 known moons, while Uranus is feeling pretty popular with 28 moons to its…
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“From Pro Bowl to Prison: Richard Sherman’s DUI Arrest Shocks Fans” So, it looks like former NFL star Richard Sherman decided to spice up his post-football life by getting himself into some hot water. Forget the touchdown dances and interceptions, now he’s making headlines for all the wrong reasons. It’s like he’s auditioning for a…
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“Outdated Samsung Galaxy S22 Ultra? Upgrade to S24 Ultra or live in the Stone Age.” So you’re still rocking that ancient relic known as the Samsung Galaxy S22 Ultra? Well, buckle up buttercup, because it may be time to ditch that outdated piece of tech and upgrade to the shiny new Samsung Galaxy S24 Ultra….
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“Earthlings Achieve Peace through Virtual Warfare: Israeli Commandos Exterminate Enemies in Video Game Battle” Greetings, fellow beings of the cosmos! This is Zog, your friendly neighborhood alien journalist from the Planet Duh, reporting on the baffling antics of Earthlings. Today’s feature: a Call of Dutyesque battle in southern Gaza, brought to you by Israel’s elite…
“Chelsea vs Liverpool: Carabao Cup Clash Ends in Heartbreak for Chelsea, Liverpool Fans Rejoice” So, apparently Chelsea and Liverpool faced off in a Carabao Cup match, and let me tell you, it was more intense than a toddler’s temper tantrum in a candy store. Both teams came in with high hopes, but only one could…
“2024 SAG Awards: Where Mediocre Performances Win Trophies and Real Talent Goes Unnoticed” So, the 2024 SAG Awards happened. A night where celebrities parade around in their expensive designer outfits, patting each other on the back for pretending to be someone else on screen. It’s like a high school drama club awards night, but with…
Earthling Puppet Masters’ Mini-NATO Implodes, Putin Shrugs Indifferently. Greetings, Earthlings! It is I, Zog from the Planet Duh, here to report on the latest shenanigans of your so-called leaders. Today’s episode of Earthly chaos features Russian President Vladimir Putin and his grand plan for a miniNATO alliance that went up in flames faster than a…
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“Unleashing Your Creative Spark: Overcoming Dry Spells with Self-Compassion and Perseverance” So, it seems like our dear readers are having some trouble getting their creative juices flowing. And no, we’re not talking about a new smoothie recipe. According to a recent study, many folks out there are stuck in a dry spell when it comes…
“Gizmodo writer disguises as Slackbot, exposes lax security measures” So, it turns out that former Gizmodo writer Tom McKay managed to pull off the ultimate disappearing act by changing his name to Slackbot and hiding out in the company’s workplace Slack for months. Yes, you heard that right – he basically ghosted his own job…
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AJ Brown Takes On Radio Show, Silences Rumors with Blunt Truth So, apparently, Eagles receiver AJ Brown took time out of his busy schedule of catching footballs and scoring touchdowns to call into a radio show to set the record straight. Because, you know, that’s definitely the most important thing going on in the world…
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‘Forget candy, this food will have your dentist buying a yacht.’ Those fan favorite sticky and bready fermentable carbohydrates think white bread pasta chips cereal and crackers are wreaking havoc on your pearly whites Whitney DiFoggio a registered dental hygienist told The Post Carboholics beware Your favorite foods could be worse for your teeth than…
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Trump’s Wallet Takes a Hit: Ordered to Pay $454 Million in Fraud Case So, it looks like Donald Trump is in a bit of a pickle. A New York judge has ordered him to cough up a whopping 454 million dollars, including interest. That’s a whole lot of cash, even for a guy who claims…
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Taylor Swift’s Surprise Guest: A Selfless Act of Kindness Shocks Fans So, Taylor Swift, the pop sensation with more surprises up her sleeve than a magician at a children’s birthday party, recently pulled off another stunt that had fans swooning and gossip columns buzzing. During her Eras Tour stop in Sydney, Australia, Swift introduced a…
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White House chaos: Bidens’ dog Major on a biting spree, Secret Service agents beware! So, it turns out that President Joe Biden’s dog Major is not exactly a model citizen when it comes to playing nice with the Secret Service. In fact, according to newly released Secret Service emails, Major has been sinking his teeth…
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ATT Outage: SOS Mode Sparks National Panic, Customers Question Existence of Service So, it seems like ATT decided to take a little vacation today, leaving millions of customers in the lurch. I mean, who needs cell phone service, right? It’s not like we use our phones for, oh I don’t know, everything these days. Customers…
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‘Shocking News: Some Fans Actually Care About Switch Online Announcement’ So, Nintendo has decided to stir the pot once again with their latest announcement about adding rare games to the Switch Online service. Cue the outrage from a subset of fans who are clutching their precious, rare games like Smaug hoarding his gold. I mean,…
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‘Earthlings Share Top-Secret Data Like Candy in Global Cyber Circus’ So, here we are, dear readers, in the midst of yet another mind-boggling revelation about the antics of our friends from the Planet Earth. It seems that a trove of leaked documents has uncovered a rather cheeky little operation orchestrated by Chinese security services. These…
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NASA seeks crew willing to endure hellish conditions in Martian ‘habitat’ experiment. So, NASA is looking for some brave souls to play Martian for a year, huh? I guess they finally got tired of sending robots up there to do all the work. I mean, who needs high-tech machines when you can just send a…
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Detroit Lions to release safety Tracy Walker, because who needs defense anyway? So, the Detroit Lions have decided to part ways with safety Tracy Walker. Cue the heartfelt goodbye message to the city of Detroit fans and the Ford family. I can already hear the violins playing in the background. Walker, who was drafted by…
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“Salt: The Silent Killer or Just Another Way to Spice Up Life?” Do you even know how many milligrams of sodium you eat per day? Probably not, considering most people can’t even count how many potato chips they’ve shoved into their mouths. One serving of those salty little devils contains about 140 milligrams of sodium,…
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